Emotions
by sg11985
Summary: thoughts as she gets ready to face her fate.


Title: Emotions  
Author: Jemma  
Story Status: Complete - missing scene.  
Series/Sequel Info: None  
Season: Six  
Spoilers: Metamorphosis  
Categories: Angst, UST.  
Pairings: Sam and Jack  
Rating: PG  
Content Warnings: None really. Bit of yucky description but nothing at all bad.  
Summary: Sam's thoughts as she gets ready to face her fate.  
Archive Permissions: Please ask.  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters relating to Stargate. They belong to MGM and any of their associates. I'm just playing around with them for a little while!  
File Size: 30 KB  
Authors Note: OKAY!! Missing scene fic for the ep of the century!! Set between when Colonel Evanov dies in his cell...and when Jonas returns and they take Jack! OK! Here we go! Enjoy folks!! Feedback would be lovely!!!!  
Date: 15/1/2003 (re-publishing on-line now cause they've been sitting on my hard drive too long!)

SGSGSGSGSG

'Get some rest, that's an order.'  
I looked across to Teal'c who nodded his head at the Colonel's request.  
I can feel everything in my body changing. My insides are different. And I know that it's happening.  
What I do next shocks even me.  
I lean over and gently rest my head on the Colonel...Jack's, shoulder, shuffling it around until I'm comfortable. I close my eyes and just savour this moment. It could be the last time I'm ever this close to him, and I want him to know that I always wanted to be this close to him.  
From the way he tenses initially, but then relaxes completely, I know he's OK with this. He knows the reason I've done it. It's to be near him.  
Everything is still for a few moments, and even though my insides are being turned inside out, this is one of the happiest moments of my life.  
Evanov coughs behind us, but in my drowsy state I don't take a lot of notice. Then it happens again.  
I slowly open my eyes, to meet the worried gaze of Teal'c who has since turned around.  
I force myself to sit up and turn around, catching Jack's eyes for a second before I take in the sight in front of me.  
Evanov is coughing up water. Oh god. That's what happened when...  
Too late.  
His body breaks down into a mass of fluids, and he's just gone.  
My mouth opens and closes in shock, just knowing that this is what's going to happen to me. It's what's going to happen to me...  
I tear my eyes away from the vision in front of me, unable to comprehend the truth.  
That's when I see.  
Jack is just looking at me.  
A million emotions race across his face.  
Sadness, shock, pity, hurt, loss, anger.  
All of them are there.  
I just stare back at him.  
'The same will happen to me,' I say quietly.  
'No,' he replies with conviction. 'It won't. I won't let it.'  
'You can't stop it,' I say just before breaking out into a coughing fit.  
Jack shuffles forward, reaches behind me and rubs my back until the fit subsides. He's so close now. We're as close as we were just moments ago.  
I can feel his breath against my face and next. Smell his unique scent.  
Then something hits me.  
The overwhelming urge to give up.  
I drop my head forward and it comes to rest just below his shoulder, on his collarbone.  
'It's happening. I can feel it.'  
The rubbing motion on my back begins again.  
'It's OK,' he whispers gently. 'It's gonna be OK. Trust me.'  
'I do,' I say into his chest. 'I do.'  
I begin to feel the strain of the position I'm sitting in, so I gently put my hands on his thighs to steady myself. I feel his chin come to rest on the top of my head, and for the first time since this all began, I feel safe.

SGSGSGSGSG

I'm not sure if I fell asleep or not, I guess I must have done.  
Anyway, the next time I wake up, Jack is gone.  
I find the strength to sit up and tilt my head to the left in search of Teal'c.  
I see him still leaning against the bars.  
'Teal'c?' I call.  
He turns around to face me.  
'Are you all right Major Carter?'  
'Yeah, where's the Colonel.'  
Teal'c lowers his head, and I instantly know what has happened.  
'Nirti,' I state calmly.  
Teal'c nods slowly.  
I shake my head out of desperation, grief, fear and any other emotions I can muster together.  
Soon enough, my energy gives out and I fall back onto the makeshift bed, once more slipping into the blissful oblivion of sleep. Knowing, and almost feeling, that it could be the last time.

SGSGSGSGSG

That's it!! I've done it!! Finito!! Hope you've enjoyed it, and as always...FEEDBACK me:)


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